Modern sayings

Funny stuff. Nothing too obscene please...

Modern sayings

Postby Ric » Fri Jul 09, 2010 8:08 am

1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

2. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

3. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

4. Those who live by the sword, get shot by those who don't.

5. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

6. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.

7. If you lined up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try to pass them, five or six at a time, on a hill, in the fog.

8. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

9. The things that come to those who wait will be the things left by those who got there first.

10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day, drinking beer.

11. Flashlight: A metal tube used to store dead batteries.

12. The shin bone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.

13. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

14. When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of 12 people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.
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Re: Modern sayings

Postby Sentinel » Fri Jul 09, 2010 7:55 pm

Ric wrote:13. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

14. When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of 12 people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.


LOL. :D
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Re: Modern sayings

Postby jdm rsk » Fri Jul 09, 2010 9:25 pm

+1 lol
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Re: Modern sayings

Postby Arith » Fri Jul 09, 2010 11:01 pm

Love it! Especially where it takes old sayings and puts a modern, practical twist to it. :D

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Re: Modern sayings

Postby Spec B Wgn » Sat Jul 10, 2010 12:30 pm

The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.


lol
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Re: Modern sayings

Postby Hobber » Sat Jul 10, 2010 12:44 pm

Spec B Wgn wrote:The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.


lol


It's funny becuase it's TRUE... :shock:
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Re: Modern sayings

Postby mickyd » Tue Aug 24, 2010 9:53 pm

how i enjoy these
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Re: Modern sayings

Postby dannyb88 » Wed Oct 06, 2010 11:32 am

just about every single one of these are So True.
friggen hilarious!
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