Hey there are a few fundamental things you are doing wrong:
1. I'm not sure what you mean by soap. Do you mean the crap that comes out of the brush at the car wash? Don't use it, it is rubbish and will quickly strip off any wax or other sealant you may have on your paint, after only a few washes. Buy a quality car wash shampoo which does not strip wax/sealants. Autoglym is my favorite brand.
2. Foam brush. If you mean that horse hair brush at the car wash that people use to scrub under their trucks and god knows what, then do not use it as you will scratch the hell out of your paint.
3. Hand scrub with sponge. Again, do not use a sponge as they will drag any surface dirt across your paint and scratch it. Use a thick pile microfibre mitt.
4. The liquid "wax" at the carwash that comes out of the jet is rubbish. No shortcuts here you have to buy a good quality product that is rubbed on and buffed off if you want a good result. This is done after the car is washed and perfectly dry.
5. Soft water... waste of money. You should dry your car down with a cloth instead. Again you can't take shortcuts by rinsing with soft water and hope you don't get watermarks, unless you have a very good wax/sealant on your car which it doesn't sound like you do. Throw that crappy synthetic chamois out as they only scratch paint and take too long to dry. Buy yourself a microfibre drying cloth with a thick, waffle wave pattern on it.
Sounds like your paint may need some serious attention; see the other thread about Final Inspections I suggest you go see them and get your paint fixed up then they could give you a tip or two on how to maintain it

p.s. Don't worry these are all common mistakes people make when starting out (I did too).