club.liberty.asn.au

I'll start off with an easy one...

How did the EMO get out of the tree?

Cut the rope.

Why do Elephants wear condoms on their feet?

Coz if they step on you you're fucked !!

What’s red and attached to the back of a train?

- a miscarriage

What’s green and smells like pork?

- kermits finger

John Bercow

Q: Why did the koala fall out of the tree?
A: It was dead.

Q: Why did the second koala fall out of the tree?
A: It was stapled to the first koala.

Q: Why did the third koala fall out of the tree?
A: Peer pressure.

Q: Why did the wombat die?
A: Three koalas fell on it.

A duck and a chicken are standing next to a road when the duck goes to cross.
The chicken grabs the duck and says ‘Don’t do it...you will never hear the end of it’

A guy walks into a bar and sees a 1 foot piano player over by the door. He goes over to the bartender, orders a beer, and says “man, how’d you get such a short piano player.” The bartender says in response” there’s a genie in the back of the bar.” The man finishes his beer and runs to the back, looking for the genie. He finds it and says “I wish for a million bucks.” Suddenly, a million ducks fly out of the bar. The customer looks confused and goes back to the bartender and says “what just happened” the bartender replies “the genie is half deaf, do you really think I’d ask for a 12 inch pianist?”

I went to see the nurse this morning
for my annual checkup .
She said i had to stop wanking.
When i asked why she said,
Because I'm trying to examine you.

Q: What do you call a Wog in a wheelchair?
A: Sick mate!

Q2: What do you call a Wog in a coffin?
A: Fuly sick mate!

Q: What do annoying colleagues and clouds have in common?

A: Eventually they f$@k off and it's a nice day.

Dude walks into a bar. Has a few drinks, goes home and complains about how nothing means anything, busts out a gun and shoots wife, kids, himself.