Not quite PC

by **zorbaru** » Fri Apr 24, 2009 3:01 pm

yeh, i joined in nov 07, but my dreams of owning a lib faded so i wasnt really active until a month ago.

by **zorbaru** » Wed Apr 29, 2009 3:02 pm

ok here we go....

What do you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?
Slow down and use a lubricant

What did he cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
Wiped his arse

How do you annoy Lady Gaga???
Pokerface

I just saw that Harry Potter film. A bit unrealistic if you ask me. I mean, a ginger kid, with two friends?

I had a mate who was suicidal. He was really depressed, so I pushed him in front of a steam train.
He was chuffed to bits.

What do you give an epileptic in a bath?
The washing

by **smythie** » Wed Apr 29, 2009 3:03 pm

Rudd , Gillard and Swan are flying on the Executive Airbus to a gathering in Canberra when Rudd turns to Gillard and says, chuckling,'You know, I could throw a $1000 bill out the window right now and make someone very happy .'

Gillard shrugs and replies, 'Well, I could throw ten $100 bills out the window and make ten people happy.'

Not to be outdone, Swan says, 'Well I could throw a hundred $10 bills out the window and make a hundred people happy.'

The pilot rolls his eyes and says to his co-pilot, 'Arrogant pricks back there. I could throw all three of them out the window and make 21 million people happy.'

by **Sentinel** » Wed Apr 29, 2009 6:51 pm

^^^^^ Good, but not quite adapted from the yank version properly... :roll:

by **tangcla** » Fri May 08, 2009 1:52 pm

A man goes into a library and asks for a book on suicide.

The librarian says; "Fuck off, you won't bring it back."

by **tangcla** » Fri May 08, 2009 2:09 pm

There was a guy with a really little arm, and people always made fun of him.

One day he found a genie,

"I'll give you 3 wishes''.

And the guy said,

''Cool, I want my arms to be the same.''

*Both arms get extremely little*

''No! the other way around!''

*His left hand gets in place of the right one and the right one in the left one's place*

''IDIOT!''

*Guy turns into a retard*

by **tangcla** » Fri May 08, 2009 2:10 pm

Have you ever noticed that it's only 'perfect' people who are murdered or killed in horrific accidents?
"He was the perfect son" or "She was the perfect daughter."
"Such a tragic accident they were the perfect family."
"They died together, the perfect couple till the end."
Makes me glad I abuse my kids and beat up my wife.
Kind of makes me immortal.

by **tangcla** » Fri May 08, 2009 2:12 pm

I'm not racist. Racism is a crime and crime is for black people.

by **smythie** » Sun May 10, 2009 3:51 pm

Gold Tangcla. Gold

by **Sentinel** » Sun May 10, 2009 5:16 pm

Nice work Clarence!

I love the library one!

by **adam** » Sun May 10, 2009 7:14 pm

i love kids........

couldn't eat a whole one though.

by **Fangin_RX** » Sun May 10, 2009 7:47 pm

adam wrote:i love kids........

couldn't eat a whole one though.

Just a touch weird? :lol:

by **Sentinel** » Sun May 10, 2009 8:14 pm

Fangin_RX wrote:
adam wrote:i love kids........

couldn't eat a whole one though.

Just a touch weird?

Ah, agree...

by **smythie** » Mon May 11, 2009 9:27 pm

What did one priest say to the other?

"I'll swap you a ten for two fives" :wink:

by **Sentinel** » Mon May 11, 2009 9:32 pm

smythie wrote:What did one priest say to the other?

"I'll swap you a ten for two fives"

LOL.. That's bad! (In a good way).

Not quite PC

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